July 2006


A friend of mine has a shiny record of always giving good linkage … in an e-mail earlier today, he linked me to this site. I had to pass it along. If you’ve seen it, keep your snarky comments to yourself, eh? Just re-read it and enjoy!


Being an Evil Overlord seems to be a good career choice. It pays well, there are all sorts of perks and you can set your own hours. However every Evil Overlord I’ve read about in books or seen in movies invariably gets overthrown and destroyed in the end. I’ve noticed that no matter whether they are barbarian lords, deranged wizards, mad scientists or alien invaders, they always seem to make the same basic mistakes every single time. With that in mind, allow me to present …

The Top 100 Things I’d Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord

1. My Legions of Terror will have helmets with clear plexiglass visors, not face-concealing ones.

2. My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through.

3. My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed, not kept anonymously imprisoned in a forgotten cell of my dungeon.

4. Shooting is not too good for my enemies.

5. The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

6. I will not gloat over my enemies’ predicament before killing them.

7. When I’ve captured my adversary and he says, “Look, before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?” I’ll say, “No.” and shoot him. No, on second thought I’ll shoot him then say “No.”

8. After I kidnap the beautiful princess, we will be married immediately in a quiet civil ceremony, not a lavish spectacle in three weeks’ time during which the final phase of my plan will be carried out.

9. I will not include a self-destruct mechanism unless absolutely necessary. If it is necessary, it will not be a large red button labelled “Danger: Do Not Push”. The big red button marked “Do Not Push” will instead trigger a spray of bullets on anyone stupid enough to disregard it. Similarly, the ON/OFF switch will not clearly be labelled as such.

10. I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum — a small hotel well outside my borders will work just as well.

11. I will be secure in my superiority. Therefore, I will feel no need to prove it by leaving clues in the form of riddles or leaving my weaker enemies alive to show they pose no threat.

12. One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws in my plan that he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation.

13. All slain enemies will be cremated, or at least have several rounds of ammunition emptied into them, not left for dead at the bottom of the cliff. The announcement of their deaths, as well as any accompanying celebration, will be deferred until after the aforementioned disposal.

14. The hero is not entitled to a last kiss, a last cigarette, or any other form of last request.

15. I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117 and the hero is just putting his plan into operation.

16. I will never utter the sentence “But before I kill you, there’s just one thing I want to know.”

17. When I employ people as advisors, I will occasionally listen to their advice.

18. I will not have a son. Although his laughably under-planned attempt to usurp power would easily fail, it would provide a fatal distraction at a crucial point in time.

19. I will not have a daughter. She would be as beautiful as she was evil, but one look at the hero’s rugged countenance and she’d betray her own father.

20. Despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I will not indulge in maniacal laughter. When so occupied, it’s too easy to miss unexpected developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly.

21. I will hire a talented fashion designer to create original uniforms for my Legions of Terror, as opposed to some cheap knock-offs that make them look like Nazi stormtroopers, Roman footsoldiers, or savage Mongol hordes. All were eventually defeated and I want my troops to have a more positive mind-set.

22. No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I will not consume any energy field bigger than my head.

23. I will keep a special cache of low-tech weapons and train my troops in their use. That way — even if the heroes manage to neutralize my power generator and/or render the standard-issue energy weapons useless — my troops will not be overrun by a handful of savages armed with spears and rocks.

24. I will maintain a realistic assessment of my strengths and weaknesses. Even though this takes some of the fun out of the job, at least I will never utter the line “No, this cannot be! I AM INVINCIBLE!!!” (After that, death is usually instantaneous.)

25. No matter how well it would perform, I will never construct any sort of machinery which is completely indestructible except for one small and virtually inaccessible vulnerable spot.

26. No matter how attractive certain members of the rebellion are, there is probably someone just as attractive who is not desperate to kill me. Therefore, I will think twice before ordering a prisoner sent to my bedchamber.

27. I will never build only one of anything important. All important systems will have redundant control panels and power supplies. For the same reason I will always carry at least two fully loaded weapons at all times.

28. My pet monster will be kept in a secure cage from which it cannot escape and into which I could not accidentally stumble.

29. I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies into confusion.

30. All bumbling conjurers, clumsy squires, no-talent bards, and cowardly thieves in the land will be preemptively put to death. My foes will surely give up and abandon their quest if they have no source of comic relief.

31. All naive, busty tavern wenches in my realm will be replaced with surly, world-weary waitresses who will provide no unexpected reinforcement and/or romantic subplot for the hero or his sidekick.

32. I will not fly into a rage and kill a messenger who brings me bad news just to illustrate how evil I really am. Good messengers are hard to come by.

33. I won’t require high-ranking female members of my organization to wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual dress-code. Similarly, outfits made entirely from black leather will be reserved for formal occasions.

34. I will not turn into a snake. It never helps.

35. I will not grow a goatee. In the old days they made you look diabolic. Now they just make you look like a disaffected member of Generation X.

36. I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cell block, let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing out copies to every bottom-rung guard in the prison.

37. If my trusted lieutenant tells me my Legions of Terror are losing a battle, I will believe him. After all, he’s my trusted lieutenant.

38. If an enemy I have just killed has a younger sibling or offspring anywhere, I will find them and have them killed immediately, instead of waiting for them to grow up harboring feelings of vengeance towards me in my old age.

39. If I absolutely must ride into battle, I will certainly not ride at the forefront of my Legions of Terror, nor will I seek out my opposite number among his army.

40. I will be neither chivalrous nor sporting. If I have an unstoppable superweapon, I will use it as early and as often as possible instead of keeping it in reserve.

41. Once my power is secure, I will destroy all those pesky time-travel devices.

42. When I capture the hero, I will make sure I also get his dog, monkey, ferret, or whatever sickeningly cute little animal capable of untying ropes and filching keys happens to follow him around.

43. I will maintain a healthy amount of skepticism when I capture the beautiful rebel and she claims she is attracted to my power and good looks and will gladly betray her companions if I just let her in on my plans.

44. I will only employ bounty hunters who work for money. Those who work for the pleasure of the hunt tend to do dumb things like even the odds to give the other guy a sporting chance.

45. I will make sure I have a clear understanding of who is responsible for what in my organization. For example, if my general screws up I will not draw my weapon, point it at him, say “And here is the price for failure,” then suddenly turn and kill some random underling.

46. If an advisor says to me “My liege, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?”, I will reply “This.” and kill the advisor.

47. If I learn that a callow youth has begun a quest to destroy me, I will slay him while he is still a callow youth instead of waiting for him to mature.

48. I will treat any beast which I control through magic or technology with respect and kindness. Thus if the control is ever broken, it will not immediately come after me for revenge.

49. If I learn the whereabouts of the one artifact which can destroy me, I will not send all my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them out to seize something else and quietly put a Want-Ad in the local paper.

50. My main computers will have their own special operating system that will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Macintosh powerbooks.

51. If one of my dungeon guards begins expressing concern over the conditions in the beautiful princess’ cell, I will immediately transfer him to a less people-oriented position.

52. I will hire a team of board-certified architects and surveyors to examine my castle and inform me of any secret passages and abandoned tunnels that I might not know about.

53. If the beautiful princess that I capture says “I’ll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!”, I will say “Oh well” and kill her.

54. I will not strike a bargain with a demonic being then attempt to double-cross it simply because I feel like being contrary.

55. The deformed mutants and odd-ball psychotics will have their place in my Legions of Terror. However before I send them out on important covert missions that require tact and subtlety, I will first see if there is anyone else equally qualified who would attract less attention.

56. My Legions of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 meters will be used for target practice.

57. Before employing any captured artifacts or machinery, I will carefully read the owner’s manual.

58. If it becomes necessary to escape, I will never stop to pose dramatically and toss off a one-liner.

59. I will never build a sentient computer smarter than I am.

60. My five-year-old child advisor will also be asked to decipher any code I am thinking of using. If he breaks the code in under 30 seconds, it will not be used. Note: this also applies to passwords.

61. If my advisors ask “Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?”, I will not proceed until I have a response that satisfies them.

62. I will design fortress hallways with no alcoves or protruding structural supports which intruders could use for cover in a firefight.

63. Bulk trash will be disposed of in incinerators, not compactors. And they will be kept hot, with none of that nonsense about flames going through accessible tunnels at predictable intervals.

64. I will see a competent psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be a disadvantage.

65. If I must have computer systems with publically available terminals, the maps they display of my complex will have a room clearly marked as the Main Control Room. That room will be the Execution Chamber. The actual main control room will be marked as Sewage Overflow Containment.

66. My security keypad will actually be a fingerprint scanner. Anyone who watches someone press a sequence of buttons or dusts the pad for fingerprints then subsequently tries to enter by repeating that sequence will trigger the alarm system.

67. No matter how many shorts we have in the system, my guards will be instructed to treat every surveillance camera malfunction as a full-scale emergency.

68. I will spare someone who saved my life sometime in the past. This is only reasonable as it encourages others to do so. However, the offer is good one time only. If they want me to spare them again, they’d better save my life again.

69. All midwives will be banned from the realm. All babies will be delivered at state-approved hospitals. Orphans will be placed in foster-homes, not abandoned in the woods to be raised by creatures of the wild.

70. When my guards split up to search for intruders, they will always travel in groups of at least two. They will be trained so that if one of them disappears mysteriously while on patrol, the other will immediately initiate an alert and call for backup, instead of quizzically peering around a corner.

71. If I decide to test a lieutenant’s loyalty and see if he/she should be made a trusted lieutenant, I will have a crack squad of marksmen standing by in case the answer is no.

72. If all the heroes are standing together around a strange device and begin to taunt me, I will pull out a conventional weapon instead of using my unstoppable superweapon on them.

73. I will not agree to let the heroes go free if they win a rigged contest, even though my advisors assure me it is impossible for them to win.

74. When I create a multimedia presentation of my plan designed so that my five-year-old advisor can easily understand the details, I will not label the disk “Project Overlord” and leave it lying on top of my desk.

75. I will instruct my Legions of Terror to attack the hero en masse, instead of standing around waiting while members break off and attack one or two at a time.

76. If the hero runs up to my roof, I will not run up after him and struggle with him in an attempt to push him over the edge. I will also not engage him at the edge of a cliff. (In the middle of a rope-bridge over a river of molten lava is not even worth considering.)

77. If I have a fit of temporary insanity and decide to give the hero the chance to reject a job as my trusted lieutentant, I will retain enough sanity to wait until my current trusted lieutenant is out of earshot before making the offer.

78. I will not tell my Legions of Terror “And he must be taken alive!” The command will be “And try to take him alive if it is reasonably practical.”

79. If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon as it has been employed it will be melted down and made into limited-edition commemorative coins.

80. If my weakest troops fail to eliminate a hero, I will send out my best troops instead of wasting time with progressively stronger ones as he gets closer and closer to my fortress.

81. If I am fighting with the hero atop a moving platform, have disarmed him, and am about to finish him off and he glances behind me and drops flat, I too will drop flat instead of quizzically turning around to find out what he saw.

82. I will not shoot at any of my enemies if they are standing in front of the crucial support beam to a heavy, dangerous, unbalanced structure.

83. If I’m eating dinner with the hero, put poison in his goblet, then have to leave the table for any reason, I will order new drinks for both of us instead of trying to decide whether or not to switch with him.

84. I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the opposite sex.

85. I will not use any plan in which the final step is horribly complicated, e.g. “Align the 12 Stones of Power on the sacred altar then activate the medallion at the moment of total eclipse.” Instead it will be more along the lines of “Push the button.”

86. I will make sure that my doomsday device is up to code and properly grounded.

87. My vats of hazardous chemicals will be covered when not in use. Also, I will not construct walkways above them.

88. If a group of henchmen fail miserably at a task, I will not berate them for incompetence then send the same group out to try the task again.

89. After I captures the hero’s superweapon, I will not immediately disband my legions and relax my guard because I believe whoever holds the weapon is unstoppable. After all, the hero held the weapon and I took it from him.
90. I will not design my Main Control Room so that every workstation is facing away from the door.

91. I will not ignore the messenger that stumbles in exhausted and obviously agitated until my personal grooming or current entertainment is finished. It might actually be important.

92. If I ever talk to the hero on the phone, I will not taunt him. Instead I will say this his dogged perseverance has given me new insight on the futility of my evil ways and that if he leaves me alone for a few months of quiet contemplation I will likely return to the path of righteousness. (Heroes are incredibly gullible in this regard.)

93. If I decide to hold a double execution of the hero and an underling who failed or betrayed me, I will see to it that the hero is scheduled to go first.

94. When arresting prisoners, my guards will not allow them to stop and grab a useless trinket of purely sentimental value.

95. My dungeon will have its own qualified medical staff complete with bodyguards. That way if a prisoner becomes sick and his cellmate tells the guard it’s an emergency, the guard will fetch a trauma team instead of opening up the cell for a look.

96. My door mechanisms will be designed so that blasting the control panel on the outside seals the door and blasting the control panel on the inside opens the door, not vice versa.

97. My dungeon cells will not be furnished with objects that contain reflective surfaces or anything that can be unravelled.

98. If an attractive young couple enters my realm, I will carefully monitor their activities. If I find they are happy and affectionate, I will ignore them. However if circumstance have forced them together against their will and they spend all their time bickering and criticizing each other except during the intermittent occasions when they are saving each others’ lives at which point there are hints of sexual tension, I will immediately order their execution.

99. Any data file of crucial importance will be padded to 1.45Mb in size.

100. Finally, to keep my subjects permanently locked in a mindless trance, I will provide each of them with free unlimited Internet access.

Of course, these are merely the Top 100 Things I’d do. Other suggestions have been sent to me which didn’t quite make the Top 100 List. But they are still so good that I couldn’t bear to throw them out. Therefore, as an expression of gratitude, I have tossed them into Cellblock A and Cellblock B

This Evil Overlord List is Copyright 1996-1997 by Peter Anspach. If you enjoy it, feel free to pass it along or post it anywhere, provided that (1) it is not altered in any way, and (2) this copyright notice is attached.

Seeya on the flip side πŸ˜‰
– GermanCityVillainousGirl

Currently listening to Naite Iru Hito (Yomigaeru Hi) by The Back Horn.

Meal: still digesting my egg white omelette with turkey + swiss from this morning …

Yup. It’s going to be a few blog entries all smushed together so I can keep up with the updating. I don’t feel like backdating or anything so here goes …

A few days ago …

The weather was again making with the digustingly perfect – sunny, cloudless, yet at the same time cool enough to walk around without breaking a sweat. So naturally, we hopped in the car and decided to have lunch al fresco down at Ivar’s in Mukilteo. We snagged a prime table because of a lady changed her mind about wanting to sit outside. Yay!

GC chose their apple wood smoked wild King Salmon. It was served with a lovely chunky chipotle-peach chutney and wild rice pilaf. My choice for entree was Alaskan razor clams, lightly panko breaded with grilled zucchini and the wild rice pilaf. Since we were peckish enough for starters, we opted for one cup of Northwest Smoked Salmon chowder and their baby greens salad. I managed to remember to snap a photo of it …

it had chunks of Rogue River bleu cheese, a slightly sweet raspberry vinaigrette, toasted hazelnuts, cherry tomatoes, piquant red onion, and in lieu of croutons – two breadsticks crisscrossing the top. I could have easily eaten twice the portion because the flavours melded together wonderfully. I need to keep the camera out because I end up getting a photo of the beginning of the meal but forget to snap when the entrees arrive! Maybe I should just do a food blog because I enjoy taking photos of artfully arranged meals …

anyway, we were nicely warmed in the sun and basked like lizards as we savoured our afternoon lunch. Afterwards, we strolled back towards the car, taking the long way around. We walked down two piers and I made the acquaintance of a six-month old dachshund who was so excited to meet new people that there was a bit of the excited bladder. I managed to dodge the tinkle but the wiener dog was too phenomenally cute.

The lighthouse was open, so we walked the grounds to the seawall behind it. Like last time, the ferry was departing for across the waters so we watched the cars load and the pedestrians walk across.

I’m getting quite used to going out for lunch and then following it up with a nice constitutional afterwards. In Houston and Phoenix, the weather rarely played nice enough to want to walk around … and before you native Arizonians get your feathers in a bunch, I mean to say around the places we frequented. Living here surrounded by so much phenomenal beauty makes me, the couch potato extraordinaire, want to get out and walk around to see it all up close … not just drive by it and acknowledge it cursorily.

But enough about seafood by the sea, my next entry entails the Fleck show down at the Moore and the singer I’m way smitten with πŸ˜‰ …

A few more days ago before …

We had tickets to see Bela Fleck & the Flecktones downtown at a place we’ve never been before, The Moore. We hopped a trusty bus, walked a handful of blocks, and found ourselves there with no stress from parking. I rather like this whole not driving into town thing … but I’ve said that before. Third row seats to see the Acoustic Planet Tour, with Bela and guest artists: Chris Thile, an amazing mandolin player and The Duhks, a group from Winnepeg that was one of the best surprises of the night. But I don’t want to get ahead of myself …

Our seats were rather choice. We’ve had the fortune of seeing them front row centre a few times before, once actually at the Celebrity Theatre in Phoenix, so we could handle a third row experience πŸ˜‰

Thile took the stage and made with the impressive mandolin skills and witty banter. He joked about how entertainers loved the applause but ultimately wondered why we loved them, if we did love them. He was charmingly goofy and played (as well as sang) beautifully. He left the stage and there was a well-choreographed transition between his set and the next, which was the Duhks. I should add their pronunciation of “ducks” not “dukes” so you know if you were curious to pick up either artist’s new CDs … release date September 12th, as we were jokingly reminded throughout their sets.

The Duhks’ lead singer, a bleached blonde spiky-haired woman took the stage. Wearing a strapless red dress with gold flowers and tattooed like a biker chick … sporting white canvas tennis shoes. GC and I looked at each other and wondered what kind of music we’d be hearing, since we had heard the cherubic-faced fiddle player and bald Latin percussionist and banjoist in their band already.

And then she started to sway, she opened her mouth, and sang.

Sweet Jesus. We did not expect that voice to come out of that person.

A husky, soulful voice. One that hit you right where you live … that could make you sing a hymnal and raise your hand high. A voice that completely blew me away enough to buy both of their CDs at the swag table as we left. A voice that well … rocked the house! This band with its hybrid of twanging banjo, Afro-Cuban percussion, Irish fiddlin’, and down home gospel vocals literally defies classification and definitely does not fall into any one category except for fucking amazing. I’m a fan. Oh yeah, they rock.

Their set was amazing … and then Thile came out to join them.

So again, we were treated to some mandolin-infused groovin’ … a few songs later, Victor Wooten came out to add some bass rhythm to the music. Now anyone who considers themselves a bass player will know that man’s name. He does things with that instrument that I’ve never seen done and continues to innovate every time I’ve seen them live. And side note, GC and I counted it up, we’ve seen the Flecktones eight times. Wow. I think that’s about as many times as I’ve seen Depeche Mode …

Then like another well-choreographed dance sequence, members of the Duhks excused themselves in lieu of a Flecktone taking the stage. Smooth like glass, each member was replaced by another until there were nothing but the Flecktones and Bela on the stage. Now, if I told you that I went to see a banjoist play, you might think me mad. But Bela is no ordinary musician … he’s played everything from bluegrass to classical to jazz. And he’s been nominated for Grammies in more categories than any other artist … nine or ten, I’d have to google to check that one. The man has skill and is extremely kind in person.

A Bela Fleck & the Flecktones show in Ft. Worth was our first date. GC flew in, we drove to DFW, and the rest is history. But I digress, back to the music. The Flecktones played one of the shorter sets I’ve seen from them but when I counted up the total 3.5 hours of music with no breaks, I’m so not complaining! And then another transition! Members of the Duhks came back out to play with Thile and the Flecktones until finally they were all on stage together. You can see them all here, here, and here.

And after over 200 minutes of music, it ended. Out of all the shows I’ve attended in recent years, this show gave the best value for the single concert ticket. Anytime I’m treated to a band unknown to me that I like, I’m all for it! TV on the Radio was like that at the Franz Ferdinand show in Vancouver … so yeah, wow. Great show!

So there you have it. The singer that bewitched me … not in the way that I’m in love with GC or living in Seattle but definitely in the way that one can be smitten with something or someone new. It wasn’t tawdry or verging on the gay (to be heard in the Cho), just a crush that you get when you get swept away …

so check out their stuff and allow her voice to sweep you away. It’ll definitely make you want to see them live.

And now, I need to go and get tickets for the midnight show of Pirates tonight. So later if I’m awake, a blog about fireworks on the 4th and my two tarnished cents on Jack Sparrow …

mmmmm. Depp.

Seeya on the stern mateys πŸ˜‰
– GermanCitySquirrel

Currently listening to the self-titled CD by The Duhks

Meal: Cold leftover roasted pork noodles + some freshly brewed iced tea.

Yesterday evening the menfolk went out to see PotC. When I mean the menfolk, I mean GC and Achimba. I opted to hang with the female Prophets, which was fun and low-key. We watched some Anthony Bourdain and chatted. It was the fun.

It looks like we’ll be seeing films at the Galaxy 12 in Monroe. Since half of their screens are digital, this means we can catch films a few weeks after their opening without having to suffer through a crappy print. It’ll save on the headache of parking downtown when we want to catch a big screen release.

Today was spent again out and about in Seattle. We found ourselves at a park that overlooked the water. I did so much driving in circles, looking at various paint combinations on houses that I doubt I could tell you where we ended up. But that’s the most fun, isn’t it? Just driving around to some place and then seeing where you landed?

There were flagstones scattered intermittently at the view point. I am a fan of random art like this. I might not love the piece but the fact it’s just there makes me smile. Geez, I sound like a fucking Pollyanna today, don’t I? Oh well, I had a good day so *sticks tongue out in defiance* …

Ha! In checking out the photos that I uploaded, I found the clue that refreshed my memory. It turns out we were in the area of the Parsons Memorial Garden which meant we were in the Queen Anne neighbourhood. I should have known from the pricey digs surrounding the views.

Exercise in futility.

Blue pretties.

Impish monkey.

Water.

I can’t say this enough but this city is really pretty. Can you imagine walking out your front door and seeing this when you look to the right? What a killer view!

Our last stop before heading home was another park that had swings. I don’t think I need to explain why.

Forward.

Back.

We ran into the couple that we saw at the first park. The ones having the relationship talk in which body language intimated that he was breaking up with her and it was not going well. They left the first park ostensibly to have some more privacy but imagine our surprise when we saw them again at the next one. They were far down the hill though so they would have had to look up and over their shoulders to notice us at all. We did not play the part of voyeurs though. C’mon. There were swings.

At the top of the stairs near the park, there was a nice view of the surrounding waters. Again, imagine if this was your view when you awakened. Ahhh. Last link before bed, I just liked the composition …

Seeya on the flip side πŸ˜‰
– GermanCitySleepyGirl

Currently listening to some Chopin on WCPE.

Meal: Mongolian beef + steamed rice.

I called around Seattle to try to find a landscaping company that wasn’t going to charge us an arm and a leg. After a handful of dead ends and misfires, I was successful and ended up with a halvsie like me. Whoo-hoo!

Yesterday morning, Henry and his crew began their work. Eight hours later, they were done. They were amazing and did a fantastic job for a fair price. Hapa represent!

And this will be a quick post today, just some photos to illustrate their grooviness.

Before:

Front walk.

Side patio.

Patio proper.

Front yard.

And after:

Front walk.

Front walk – alt view.

Side patio.

Patio proper.

Front yard.

Seeya on the flip side πŸ˜‰
– GermanCityGirl

Currently listening to Music for the Masses by Depeche Mode.

Meal: None yet, still waking up slowly.

We use Greenwood Avenue as our alternate route into downtown when the 5 is insane and we don’t wish to look at the ugliness of Aurora. That said, we’ve seen this place a few times but today, there was an unloading zone for me to park in temporarily while GC hopped out to investigate.

Greenwood Space Travel Supply benefits a non-profit tutoring centre that assists school children with improving their writing skills.

Storefront.

Parking.

Our earlier meal began nicely with something refreshing to drink. I always pour two glasses despite GC’s dislike of beer. I think I do that so the waitress won’t do it for us.

Beer.

Tempura.

Sushi.

Seeya on the flip side πŸ˜‰
– GermanCityGirl

Currently listening to GC reading a film review.

Meal: Lovingly photographed above.

There was no trip to the moon. We’ve plenty of cheese in the fridge. One might say too much but I digress, on with the tale.

Today was another pleasant day in Seattle so we decided to have a lunch and go exploring. At this rate, we’ll never fully unpack. I know it irritates the monkey so. All that is left are my books … which I procrastinate at every turn to unpack. I don’t ignore the pleas of said monkey nor do I do it to vex him … I just can’t find the energy to sort the fuckers. Maybe I should just sell them off if I can’t decide which to keep. I can’t collect everything, right?

I liked the colours on this van, it was parked somewhere in Capitol Hill, en route to the park.

Oh yeah, the park. We ended up at Volunteer Park, near the Asian Art Museum. We had been curious about a cylindrical brick structure so we decided to investigate. GC went up first to see if it was worth my ascent up the stairs. It was. So off I went up, up, and up to the tip top of the tower, the Volunteer Park Water Tower to be exact. There were about 200 steps in all, not that much in you think about it but if you’ve got a crappy knee like mine … it’s a consideration. Grr.

There is a 360˚ view of Seattle that stretches all the way to the 520 bridge over Lake Washington. I snapped quite a few photos once I figured out how to angle my lens within the grating installed obviously to stop people from doing stupid things. I’d wager many Seattleites might not even know this is here, maybe they’ve seen it but never ventured upstairs. It’s pretty damn cool.

Enjoy the photos:

Exterior #1

View of 520.

Interior #1. This reminded me of the inside of a crab shell.

View of Space Needle + Bay.

Grated window.

GC’s insolent stance. Now if I could only get him into a kilt …

Exterior #2

After leaving the Tower, we continued to the other side of the park. There were more things to take photos of like random statuary, GC in front of a tree, and just look for yourself.

White Man’s Burden.

Handsome in green.

Who is this Thomas Burke? You people know I looked that man up the moment I got home …

Left of monument.

Right of monument.

View of Space Needle beside the Noguchi that’s on site. Don’t you wish you could go for a swim there?

Random cairns.

The photo shown below was of a reluctant Shiba Inu whose owner was brushing out his coat. He kept watching me walk back and forth, looking like he wanted attention from anything other than that damnable brush. I know better than to approach a strange dog though and when the owner’s body language isn’t open, despite my yearning to play with a puppy … I keep on walking. I just liked the juxtaposition of the foot and the dog, so you’re stuck with the story of why I took it.

I rarely do this. I usually post photos of others because I prefer to be behind the camera and not in front of it. Not because I’m not a cute thing (if you’ve met me in person, I have my moments) but I mostly because I enjoy the relative anonymity that teh interwebs can provide.

Anyway, I’m breaking my rule.

I’m posting a photo of me because I like how the composition turned out. It was one of those self-taken portraits that was supposed to be on the cuter side rather than pretentious, in that tortured art school way.

I don’t look my best there. A bit sun-baked and warm like a freshly steamed bao … so here’s one of me in the winter posing and being (dare I pun) corny.

Oh yes, I dared.

Seeya on the flip side πŸ˜‰
– GermanCityGirl

Currently listening to kawaii radio.

Meal: Not terribly hungry yet, I’m betting though it might be a grilled chicken salad night.

GC’s paternal unit + 1 has come and gone. It was a painless visit. No arguments over the native flora and fauna or what to do. They washed clothing, hung out, went to see some live show, ate good food, and then made their way back down South.

Painless.

Here’s some random photos of the trip + random captions.

We took them to the fat happy olive place. I chose the pasta + puttanesca sauce and smoked salmon. I remember the first time I learned where the name came from. I’ve always had a fondness of it ever since. Who doesn’t love a good pasta the way a whore would make it? GC opted for a pasta with rabbit or elk sausage, I can’t really remember. Now that I’ve uploaded this photos, it’s hard to discern them from each other though they tasted nothing alike.

My pasta.

His pasta.

After our Italian meal, we drove around to give them a tour of Seattle at night. Mostly also to kill some time until everyone was ready for dessert. We decided to take them to 13 Coins downtown for coffee + something sweet. I chose poorly, a Zabaglione that in theory should have been good but was not. It really was unappetizing.

GC, however, chose wisely. He chose a strawberry shortcake that looked so inviting. I tasted it and ended up ordering one after the waiter cleared the offending custard away.

Blech.

Mmmm.

The day before, we took them on a road trip to the Mukilteo’s Ivar’s. We walked down to the beach afterwards and it was a good day to be outside. GC did an impression of a sea turtle returning from shore. It was cute. I love a smart-ass that can make me laugh πŸ™‚

Sea turtle.

On their way out of town, we all stopped for a quick meal at our neighbourhood Chinese place. GC’s dad picked up the check, possibly from the chiding he had received from his girlfriend about not doing so previously.

Visitors.

It’s good to have the house back to just us and the Nubbin.

Seeya on the flip side πŸ˜‰
– GermanCityIchigoGirl

Currently listening to my mum finishing up a story about relatives. Ahh, the wonder of bluetooth headsets.

Meal: I have a ciabatta here so it might be a cold antipasto with salad + bread. Nice and simple.

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